I believe love should be simple

I believe love should be simple,
I do not need any of the perceived complexity,
The hardest thing about it,
Is that you aren't next to me.
I have no one to lean on,
no one to confess to,
No way to decompress,
When life gets too stressful.
When i'm already pessimistic,
and my half empty  cup's even less full
Life and drama combine,
trying to test my mettle,
Blurring clearly defined, fine lines,
trying stress my mental,
Hopping the challenge I would decline,
And defeated I would just settle.
"The One", "Soulmate", "True Love",
Is what I thought others have been,
Whats past has passed so the above,
I consider them has beens.
I'm not looking for a substitute mom,
a undercover dom or a sycophant,
I just want to be treated with respect,
and expect to feel significant.
Magnificent and far fetched it would seem,
even as a dream to a dreamer dreaming with in a dream.
A way to turn reality, from fantasy
There must be.
It is essential, I am not loved for potential,
by someone who "gets" me,
I am tired of falling short of the "best" me,
I should be worthy of love
By being just me

BY
LA Kellam

If I had the Strength

Is it so hard to ask,
For a love of my own,
I am tired of this "relationship",
Still feeling like I'm alone.
Is it me or am I mistaken,
Are the good ones always taken?
You love me, You love him
Yet, I rank above him?
But you are still with him?
Confused, you plead to be forgiven
Empty apologies,
Taken to an empty bed
Visions of a smoking gun,
Empty shell by my emptied  head.
Your sweet love is not worth,
Entertaining inscriptions on my tombstone,
With these self destructive thoughts,
I would rather be alone.
If I only had the strength,
to be on my own.

By,
LA Kellam

Missed Shot at Love Rebounded

I reminisce and think back,
high school,  you, on my lap,
fingertips, seem custom fit,
as I knowingly grip,
your  flawless and superb,
beautiful curves.

I didn't think I could handle you,
but I learned quick.
Ego got the best of me,
I tried being slick,
took you for granted,
and you were lost,
the price of being humbled was steep,
and you were the cost.

Every now and then i think of you,
and from afar I admire you,
ashamed that you may see
that i am not how you remember me.
But the years have done little to hide,
the competitive fire, you inspire
inside.

My sons know about you,
they want to meet you,
I will guide them,
and teach them what it takes,
and hopefully in the clutch,
they won't repeat my mistakes.

LA Kellam

Soulmate

As of late, Soulmate
there is a debate if you exist.
I too am about, to doubt,
without the presence of your kiss.
Barely manageable, without tangible,
affection.
Hurt with disgrace, cause I chose to place,
vulnerabilities without protection.
Blame for my shame,
should be directed in my direction.
For I have grown impatient,
Or perhaps you are late,
Or perhaps we will never know,
And perhaps that's just our fate.

By LA Kellam